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Forgiveness is not Reconciliation
A solid repair entails taking responsibility for the hurt caused, showing remorse for causing pain and heartache, sharing the intentions to do things differently, and revealing a commitment to be safer and more consistent moving forward. Without these heart felt and humble moves on the part of the one who caused the wound, reconciliation can’t happen.
A Shift in Perspective
But I’d say that a person who doesn’t carry shame doesn’t wield shame as a weapon. A person who doesn’t carry bitterness and jealousy doesn’t need to criticize you, or cut you down. A person who feels safe, settled, and good enough on the inside won’t turn you into competition. Conversely, a person who has peace, good will, and love toward self on the inside carries peace, good will, and love toward others on the outside.