Your Spot in His Heart

The last three blogs explained attachment as it’s understood in science, psychology, and spirituality. If I were to simplify attachment to its essence, it would be this:

 Attachment is knowing you fully exist in someone’s heart.

You can tell you fully exist in someone’s heart by how they look at you. With just a look, you know you are seen, delighted in, accepted, valued, championed, and loved.  

You can hear the love in how you are spoken to. When you call, you are responded to in way that lets you know you matter. You know you take up room in person’s heart because when you are spoken to there is gentleness, soothing, and a clarity of the message.  

You know you are fully held in someone’s heart when they organize life in a way that tells you that you are priority. Even though other aspects of life exist and must be pursued, you know you matter more.  

You know you are held in someone’s heart by how your heart and story are held. The gentle touch, the attuned presence, the plenty of space that’s given for your personality and emotions, joys and sorrows, and other parts of being.  

Yes, the very essence of attachment is knowing you fully exist in the heart of another. 

Many of you probably know the pain of not being seen or only being seen when it’s convenient or you’ve made a mess. You know the pain of only being spoken to in impatience and frustration and unkindness, not feeling like you have any value or that you are special to anyone. 

It’s totally possible to live much of life (or all of life) not feeling like a priority or somebody’s someone special. How many addictions come out of trying to get that anxious, empty, and lonely hole filled? 

What I can say to that is Jesus entered into a chasm of brokenness and deprivation and then leapt over it to capture our hearts and bring us into a deep attachment with His father.  As we invite Him into our internal landscape to process our own painful experiences of abandonment and desolation, we learn what true attachment feels like. You can find what you’ve always needed in the hesed love of your Heavenly Father. You have your own spot in his heart where you are deeply loved, held, and cherished. He doesn’t forget about you or get distracted. He’s here. With you.  

You are held within his heart. And you are safe and warm and never left alone. He’s mindful of your heart and attuned to your emotional states.

It's possible to know the experience of being loved, held in His heart, and belonging to a special Someone.  The Father sees you and looks at you with soft and caring eyes that sparkle with delight when you show up.  You are heard and responded to when you cry and you are laughed with when you make a funny. 

In my own experience with finding my deepest attachment relationship in life being with my Beloved, I have discovered all is well deep in the center of me because that is where He dwells. Where he dwells, I get to exist as I am; fully loved, delighted in, and received.  

My prayer for you is that as you were reading this and as you continue to meditate on what I’ve shared, your own sense of fully existing in God’s heart becomes a deeply healing, soothing, intimate, and recurring encounter with your Creator.  

In the days to come, expect him to show you that He sees you, hears you, loves you, and holds you. 

  • Look for perfectly timed scriptures and songs to remind you that He’s with you

  • Anticipate running into a friend or acquaintance who will speak just the right thing to let you know He’s got you.  

  • Look for him in the common, everyday moments of your life. In the deep breaths, the quick gazes out the kitchen window, on long walks in the woods. He longs for you to sense what it is to be held in His heart.  He will make himself known.

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Wounds to Wombs

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Attachment & God (pt3)