Counseling Simplified
This is the photo on the wall in my office.
As I was leaving the office last night, right before turning off the lights and shutting the door, I paused and took a moment to stare at the photograph on my wall. I’ve been working on deep breathing and pauses lately so I’m having more and more of these weird and unplanned moments where I stop in the middle of what I am doing and actually see what’s around me. I just turned 43 so I’m wondering if pauses and deep breaths are more frequent attempts of a midlife sucking the marrow out of life kind of thing.
In the pause, I realized that the framed photograph on my wall represents more than just a bargain and a good match with the paint.
It’s like I was seeing it for the first time.
What did I see in the photo that I hadn’t seen before? My heart. My vision. How I see myself as a therapist. What I understand the process of treatment to be.
In the photograph you see the silhouette of solitary figure walking along the horizon on a star filled night. You also see fantastic colors against the darkness, shades of purple and flares of blue (hence the reason it matches the Sherwin Williams Krypton wall color so well). Although the photo was taken at midnight, light pollution creates the brightness along the horizon; The photographer had to explain that to me. Anyway, until last night I saw that much of it and appreciated the photograph for its surface beauty.
In my deeper and more contemplative gaze of last night, I saw the solitary figure surrounded by Light. Streaks of activity. It’s almost as if the solitary figure (whom I see as being my client) isn’t as alone as her or she thinks and feels. Rather, I perceive that solitary figure as fully surrounded. Surrounded by love. Surrounded by hope. Surrounded by the Essence of healing and restoration. Surrounded by a future, goodness, and a community of support. Influences for healing.
Immediately following that moment in my office, I texted the photographer, Mike Weber. I wrote: I was on my way out of the office tonight and I noticed something about the photograph you sold to me . . . It is so much a representation of how I see my clients and what I want them to see about themselves . . . They walk a path and they start therapy feeling alone and like they are disconnected . . . from a spouse, Jesus, or whatever . . . but what your photo reveals is the Truth. They are not alone. They are surrounded by HIS LIGHT and PRESENCE. And that’s the greatest take away I want them to have as a result of therapy.
I want clients to come into a healing space and experience, starting their journey toward freedom. Often they come in feeling defeated and alone in a cruel cockeyed world, as the boxer in Potok’s The Chosen puts it. They can’t see the love, strength, hope, goodness, and support all around them. However, through building safe connection, by creating room for their story, by providing a therapeutic relationship where they are heard, seen, valued, and accepted, they stop feeling alone and start to see what’s been there all along.
Sometimes I think the greatest take away from therapy can be the realization that there is still safety in this world and that we are not alone; we aren’t expected to do this journey in isolation. If I can help my clients to see beyond the solitary path and instead become aware of those beautiful blue and purple hues all around them, then I will have done my part.
**I highly recommend you follow Mike Weber (Iammikeweber) on Instagram or Facebook. Guys like him can make your social media feeds meaningful, inspiring, and worthy of taking pause. I know, that concept seems too good to be true, but when his stuff comes up on my feeds, they add to my day.
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